Shall we?
Onishibari no mi ga akakunatta
Kanari na kibun o sashihasande-miru
Umaretakute kita mi ja nai kara
Shinitaku-nakutemo shinun darou toka
Satorikitta furi de
Ikite-miru ii ja nai
Hito no yo wa itsumo senbiki ga kitsui kara
Matomo ni ikeba kizudarake
Kizu o name-name ikou kana
Oni o su ni shite kuu sa
Patch, patch with something red
Like a maraschino cherry
And frozen cranberry
Chut, chut, with someone hot
Like an equalitarian
And yam-yngdourian
Fad, fad with something cool
Like a hidden luminary
And will-o-the-wisp too
Kosoku na shudan de toki o kaseide
Kisanji shina hana o matsu ma wa
Sasshi and Arumi are from Osaka,
but they're stuck, lost in mysterious worlds,
and they're having a hard time finding their way back to their birthplace, Abenobashi.
Starting with a Sword and Sorcery Shopping Arcade,
they went to a Sci-Fi Shopping Arcade,
where everything and anything was made of mecha.
A mecha Mr. Kouhei and a mecha Papa.
The Abeno Angels, dressed in sexy space outfits.
Sasshi and Arumi get on board a combining robot
and defeat the enemy, a machine beast!
Now, the place they've jumped to today is...
Well, it looks similar, but it doesn't seem quite right...
Episode 4 Fire It Up! Abenobashi * Hong Kong Combat Shopping Arcade
We've ended up in a weird place again.
Episode 4 Fire It Up! Abenobashi * Hong Kong Combat Shopping Arcade The writing's all in Chinese characters here.
Episode 4 Fire It Up! Abenobashi * Hong Kong Combat Shopping Arcade Hold on a sec, Arumi.
If it's all in Chinese characters, that means...
Yeah?
If it's all in Chinese characters, that means...
So, what does it mean?!
It's gonna be real tough to read.
You know!
Come, come, please welcome to drop by! Please welcome to drop by!
Hey, I wonder why there's a crowd over there?
That's not what I'm talkin' about.
Aren't you at least curious?
Sometimes bargains start the very day you lay eyes on each other.
Customers Galore
Tourists, come on over.
Wow, what a brilliant knockoff.
These are no knockoffs please! They are imitations please!
How about it, Miss? Wouldn't you like one?
Today's special was commissioned by Louis XV of the French Dynasty!
Louis XV
Super deluxe t-shirt!
That's so lame. It's just got it written on there.
What's so super deluxe 'bout it?
The price is mega expensive, you see!
Don't want it.
This is amazin'!
Baisan and Atranger!
Oh, this one over here is great, too!
It's the first time I've ever seen a Sasutaker knockoff!
I've had enough of robots already.
You sure never grow up, Sasshi.
Combat Tournament Grand Prize
It's cute.
You sure never grow up.
Does little Arumi want this doll?
N...
Not really.
Hey, it's a panda!
What's a panda doin' here?
Hey, Spot, Spot.
C'mere, Spot.
Why's a panda "Spot"?
Spot, Spot, Spot, Spot. Spot, Spot, Spot, Spot.
C'mon, look over here, Spot.
It's a panda, darn it!
Spot, Spot!
It ain't the same size as before!
Spins Caution
Dumpling King
Simmering Dumplings Go Slow What's a pot doin' here?!
Sasshi, watch out!
I don't get it. Why a dumplin'?
Brother!
Brother, you really are alive!
Hey!
What are you doing to my big brother?!
Your big brother?!
That's right! He's Mune-mune's big brother!
This color, this smell,
and this chewy, soft...
texture. Right?
You know, Sasshi ain't got a kid sister.
'Sides, no matter how ya look at it, you're older than him.
Huh?
Well?! I bet you can't refute that!
That's right! Brother!
Please win against the Golden Claw next time for sure!
Okay.
Listen to me when I'm talkin'!
So, what's the Golden Claw?
My son!
My son, so you are alive!
Stop it! My son, so you are alive!
What the heck is the premise this time?
Pa
Are you not the Golden Claw, who not only killed my eldest son,
but also stole a doll, which was our family treasure?!
What a mega explanatory soundin' line.
Oh, I see! So, that's the premise this time!
Let's see, a doll, the family treasure, got filched.
Don't note it, don't note it.
Ni hao, bon jour, you stinking old man.
If you want to avenge him, enter the combat tournament I sponsor.
I am using the doll that I stole from Monsieur as the prize.
What language was that?
Wh-Wh-Wh-What did you say?!
By that, you mean that you will be participatin' in
the next combat tournament that you are holdin'
and that you will fight us as well?!
"Wh-Wh-Wh-What did you say?! By that, you mean..."
Don't note it word for word.
Well, then, everyone, Adios! Amigo!
And his last words are in Spanish for some reason.
"Combat tournament, the one left out sucks up ants." Right.
There you have it. That was the Golden Claw.
That was?
Please win against him this time, Brother!
Win? In what?
Here you are.
Huh?
Sasshi
Please take the copy. Now, you are all set to enter the tournament.
Thank you very much!
What's it say?
"Every applicant participatin' in the combat tournament
will be purchasin' a high class feather futon, and all-purpose
Taisho Japanese harp that can even be played in the bath,
and various other things totalin' 700 items."
What the heck? So, they're not givin' it to us?
We don't need any of that stuff.
"If you do not wish to purchase these items, please notify us within eight days of applyin'."
Hey, the application date is written as bein' two weeks ago!
Sasshi, you've been swindled!
What?!
There, I've delivered the merchandise that you ordered.
What's combat tournaments and corrupt business practices
got to do with each other?!
Beats me.
Well, there's your total.
That's steep.
Oh, you can't pay for it?
I didn't buy it!
So, you can't pay for it.
I see.
If you can't pay for it,
you'll have to undergo the trainin'.
Wha? Trainin'?
Trainin', like...
For what?
So, you are the one who wishes to marry my daughter?
I've had enough of these messed up turns of events.
It's the first time your grandpa showed up, Sasshi.
You there, Miss,
you think I am just an ordinary old man, do you not?
Very well.
Come at me however and whenever you wan...
Wait a sec...
Hey, I said, wait. I need to prepar...
I won.
How about it?! Behold my secret technique!
I can still stand, even after the beating I took.
That's worthless.
Well, that is not important.
Let us begin the training to learn my secret technique.
Summon the acting master.
You two had better prepare yourselves.
You're...
Well?! I bet you can't get your jaw off the floor!
Oh, it's just you, Spot.
He is the acting master!
Do not take him lightly.
Any who wish to master the technique must bow to the panda.
This acting master will now put you through the training of terror in all 36 chambers...
This temple has 36 training chambers.
You will be required to clear all of them.
Is this for real? All he's said is, "Ugah!"
Shut up! Quit grumbling! Let's go!
Now, I shall teach you the weight of 4,000 years of Chinese tradition
until you become sick of it, so prepare yourself!
In the past, during the era of the first emperor of Qin,
when soldiers prepared for battle,
they valued spiritual strength over military tactics
Um... they valued spiritual strength over military tactics
Um... and in order to strengthen their spirits,
They've both already left... and in order to strengthen their spirits,
They've both already left... to say nothing of physical strength...
Tenacity
Adrian!
I have nothing left to teach you.
Ugah!
Brother!
Brother, you've finished your training, haven't you?!
Huh?
What's this mean?
Ugah! Enough's enough!
Combat
Tournament
Combat Tournament
What'll I do?
You had trainin', so won't it work out somehow?
I don't really get it, but is Papa the one we need to defeat this time?
You mean, Papa's the goblin in this world?
Right.
Oh, gimme that Super Ab-Machoness 3. I don't know...
Oh, gimme that Super Ab-Machoness 3.
Listen to me!
Considerin' the pattern from last time and the one before that,
part of me feels like there's gonna be some mega huge opponent, but...
I want that Super Ab-Machoness 3 after all.
I said, listen!
So, we meet again.
It appears there is some fate linking us.
Oh, it's the nice mister!
The key chain mister!
Mister?
What? This is the mister you bought the key chain from?
How come you know this mister, too?
Mister...
Who are you calling a mister?!
Don't you have a power stone or somethin' that works miracles, Mister?
What about a Seven Divinities of Good Fortune wallet
that really increases your luck getting money, Mister?
C'mon, Mister.
I'm telling you not to call me mister!
So, here's the ultimate item that this bro suggests you get!
Outfit That Makes You Feel Stronger!
It only makes me feel like it?!
Anyway, just do as bro says and try throwing a punch!
Oh, this is amazin'!
There!
This is retarded.
Like I said, it's the ultimate item,
"Outfit That Makes You Feel Stronger!"
Makes me feel like it? You mean, it just makes noises?
Well, at any rate, if you gain confidence, your abilities tend to follow suit.
I'll see you around.
Brother!
You absolutely must win!
If you do...
Here she is again.
This smell...
What? What?
Brother, your clothing still has the price tag on it!
I'll take it off right away.
There!
I can't breathe.
There, there!
I'm goin' on ahead.
Hey, wait!
Now, things are getting started here!
Abenobashi Shopping Arcade Golden Claw Scramble Combat Tournament!
Furthermore, to the winner of this tournament goes...
this doll!
And now, finally, I present to you
the Abenobashi Shopping Arcade Combat Tournament!
It's here at last.
Keep it together and go for it!
Here's the final round.
The final round already?!
What the heck?
So, these two're the only ones who ended up participatin' anyway!
Victory So, these two're the only ones who ended up participatin' anyway!
I have to hand it do you for coming this far without running away, mon amour.
But I am the one who will win.
You think you can scare me with that fancy-shmancy pose?!
If you're not gonna hurry up and get started,
I'll come at you first!
Hey, hey, you're runnin' away.
Hang in there, Brother!
He's strong. Is that really Papa?
I'll let you off at that for today...
Boy, you have any final words to leave the world with?
It can make all the noise it wants,
but it doesn't help one bit when what's inside is weak.
Damn it, makin' such good swingin' noises...
If you gain confidence, your abilities tend to follow suit.
Then gimme somethin' that works better!
But, now that he mentions it, ever since we came to this freaky world,
things worked out just by followin' the forms.
Just the form...
The form...
Form...
My goodness!
Sasshi just...
He looks so lame, 'cause his proportions are mega wrong.
And next up is...
Drunken Fist!
Drink only after you turn 20!
Sasshi's doin' awesome, but he looks so uncool.
And that is...
What is that?
I don't get it! It's too hardcore, I don't get it!
Look! At his hair!
You don't look good in blonde.
Don't tell me he's goin' to do that!
What is he, a monster?!
Ka-me-ha-me...
Damn it! Who is the greater geek should not be the decisive factor in a battle!
And I'll prove it to you!
Hot, hot, hot, hot!
I'll try it again.
Ka-me-ha-me...
Damn it! Who is the greater geek...
The Rest Has Been Abridged
The rest has been abridged.
How could this be?
Does that yellow suit have a battleship class beam cannon?
What the heck was all that about?
Combat Tournament
Congratulations on your victory, Sasshi.
Here you go.
Huh? The kyonshii doll?
What's this?
Brother!
Let me see that doll, too!
But, why? You worked so hard to win it.
You wanted it, right? At Mr. Kouhei's shop.
Are you sayin' it's for me?
Sasshi...
You sure really are dense.
'Sides, you seriously think a girl in grade school
would want a kyonshii in this day and age?
Well, excuse me!
What? The talisman...
I don't need anything else as long as I get this back!
Oh, it's a talisman that he wrote.
What?!
Then what about gettin' revenge and you tellin' me to win, huh?!
That was to get this talisman back, of course.
I couldn't care less about the Golden Claw.
Oh, really.
Oh, the talisman!
Huh? What's going on?!
Hey, hand over this talisman, too!
What the?! What the?!
It came back to life because the talisman was removed!
Then we gotta put that talisman back on!
No way! I finally got my hands on it!
I can't breathe...
Hand this one over, too!
This is no time for that!
Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!
Oh, the talisman!
No! My talisman!
Sasshi, what're ya lookin' at?! We're gonna get eaten!
The talisman! The talisman!
Talisman?!
Hurry! Hurry! Paste it on its face!
I can't get it off!
Got it!
Owowow...
Huh? My clothes are back.
Oh, it's a goblin! So, it was you!
Yes, yes, it is my defeat.
Speak one wish.
Damn straight!
Send us back to our real home this time!
Okay, okay.
Now, chant the spell.
All things extant in this world,
gods of Heaven, gods of Earth, let them be as they should be
All things extant in this world,
gods of Heaven, gods of Earth, let them be as they should be
Hey, don't we gotta do all sorts of other things like make offerin's?
Well, we will say that it is okay.
It'll probably be okay.
Don't say probably!
Thus shall it be.
What a nice day.
Do ya think we got back like we're supposed to?
How peaceful.
Hey, it's a kite.
That thing looks like a kite to you?
It's pretty damn big.
Kites're like that these days.
It squawks out of its pointy beak...
Th-Th-Th-Th...
That's impossible! That's impossible!
What is it this time?!
To be continued
Anata no kokoro ni kaze ga aru nara
Soshite sore ga haru no kaze nara
Watashi hitori de fukarete-mitai na itsumade mo
Itsumade mo
Anata no kokoro ni sora ga aru nara
Soshite sore ga aoi sora nara
Watashi hitori de nobotte-mitai na dokomade mo
Dokomade mo
Datte itsumo anata wa waratte iru dake
Soshite watashi o dakishimeru dake
Now, on the next Magical Shoppin' Arcade Abenobashi...
Hold on a second!
Didn't ya promise that I'd get to do the next episode previews?!
I don't remember makin' a promise like that.
You did, remember?!
Don't get all teary-eyed over somethin' so silly.
Just do it.
Really? Then, then, then, I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna do it!
Do it already!
What should I say first?
You hadn't thought about it?
Now that it's time, I've got so much I wanna say.
What kinda preview were ya plannin' on doin'?
Well, ya see, first, I'd look back just a bit on what happened in this episode, and then...
Next Time Extinction! Abenobashi * Ancient Dinosaur Shopping Arcade Well, ya see, first, I'd look back just a bit on what happened in this episode, and then...
Next Time Extinction! Abenobashi * Ancient Dinosaur Shopping Arcade Oh, there's no time left.
Next Time Extinction! Abenobashi * Ancient Dinosaur Shopping Arcade